Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

On March 25, 1958, Elvis Presley spent his first full day as a private in the US Army by receiving his official army haircut. It remains the "most photographed haircut in the world" and resulted in one of Elvis' most famous phrases - "Hair today, gone tomorrow".

That haircut took place at Fort Chaffee, AR in building 803. Luckily, for history's sake, that building was spared in the fire that raged through Fort Chaffee yesterday. Unfortunately, for history's sake, many buildings at the site were destroyed.

Fort Chaffee had a great history, even if you don't include Elvis' haircut. It was a key military training installation from the moment the first soldiers arrived the week of Dec. 7th, 1941 (sound familiar? this is the day Japan attacked Pearl Harbor) all the way through 1993. In the 70's, the fort became home to 50,000 Southeast Asian refugees and later 20,000 Caribbean refugees. Additionally, Biloxi Blues and A Soldier's Story were both filmed on location there.

I'm very sad to hear about the fire. They have not yet ruled out arson as the cause. I sure hope that's not the case.

Monday, January 28, 2008


Honestly, even though I will watch the SUPER BOWL this year (to see all the commercials) it's not one that I'm super passionate about. Well, except for the fact that I hope the Patriots get totally pwned in the SUPER BOWL. But that's only because I strongly dislike Tom Brady and their (apparently) homeless coach Bill Imasloppychick. But, neither team means that much to me. Although, in case I haven't mentioned it, I hope the Patriots completely humiliate themselves by somehow scoring negative points in this years SUPER BOWL.

Okay, it's becoming obvious to me that perhaps I am a tiny bit passionate about this years SUPER BOWL. However, my dislike of the Patriots was not the original reason I started this post. Let's get back on topic. The SUPER BOWL. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but everytime I have used the word SUPER BOWL I have typed it in all caps. Feel free to take a minute and look over what you've read so far to see if you can spot them.

See? I started with the title and so far I have said SUPER BOWL 8 times now. Want to know why? Because if I can draw attention to my blog by pissing off the NFL, I might get more traffic. Confused? I was confused when I heard a dj on a local radio station advertising a "Super Vessel" party and then heard the explanation at the end of the ad that they are not allowed to use "that other super word". Seriously, the NFL has restricted the use of the word SUPER BOWL. I decided to be a rebel and test my luck. Read more about it here.

On a side note, you may have noticed that my 1, 2, 3 posts didn't last long. I just want to explain that I stopped posting them for 2 reasons:
1. they aren't interesting to anyone beside me...okay, not even me.
2. I am lazy.

There's no need to worry though, I'm still sticking with my gameplan and hanging in there just fine.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Oh My!

It's probably not a good thing that I drive 85 miles an hour between Republic and Springfield to come to work every day...okay, I'm kidding. I usually don't go over 75.

Fugitive arrested after high-speed chase

A parole absconder who led sheriff’s deputies on a high-speed car chase this afternoon is now in custody, according to Chief Deputy Jim Arnott.

During the chase between Springfield and Republic, speeds reached up to 85 miles an hour and the suspect waved a handgun at law enforcement officers, Arnott said.

The chase ended in the 5500 block of Farm Road 148 in a grassy field after a spike ruptured the suspect’s vehicle tire. A short foot pursuit followed and the suspect was taken into custody, Arnott said.

And, while I'm here I'm gonna throw in my 1, 2, 3.
1. Today I drove the speed limit on the way to work.
2. I placed a current (and very rare) picture of me near my computer at work for motivation.
3. While I was at work I managed not to kill anyone.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

1, 2, 3

Today's positive statements:

1. I woke up late and wanted to go in to work late, but I made myself get motivated and ended up at work 10 minutes earlier than usual.

2. I took the stairs every single time today, no elevator riding!

3. Even though I didn't like it at all, I tried to eat plain non-fat yogurt for breakfast this morning. Normally I wouldn't have even tried it but I gave it a shot because it's a recommended healthy food. Any suggestions on how I can make myself like it? I put frozen blueberries and splenda in it, but i couldn't eat more than 2 bites. It was nasty.

My First Ever Giveaway Contest

Over the weekend I finished reading "A Boy's Life" by Robert R. McCammon. I completely enjoyed it, even though I've never been a boy. It was a great combination of being a relaxing, "light" read while at the same time presenting you with a mystery that needed to be solved. Very entertaining, extremely well-written. A book that I was excited about reading every night. You guys should check out the Amazon page (click on the book title above) for a description and customer opinions. I am an avid lover of books, so I do not throw them away. What I'm going to do with this one is pass it along to one of you guys so that others may enjoy it as much as I do. Anyone who is interested just leave me a comment on this post and at the beginning of February I will draw out a name and mail you the book free of charge (it's a paperback). All I ask in return is that when you are finished reading it, you agree to pass it on to someone else.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

1, 2, 3

My 3 positive statements about myself today are:

1. I am proud of myself for going to the movies and not buying any popcorn or candy - no food at all.

2. I am very happy with my calorie intake for the day.

3. I had a great time going out with my friends and managed to stay relaxed and not worry about what they "might" be thinking about me. I had fun.

Friday, January 18, 2008

1, 2, 3

I am trying to start a habit of making 3 positive statements about myself each day.
This is the first installment and it was a difficult task.

1. I did a good job of drinking water today at work. I drank an entire 44 ounces and also had 20 ounces of diet pepsi.

2. I wore nice dress pants instead of my sloppy corduroy's to work, even though it was Friday.

3. I was helpful to someone I didn't really care to be helpful to.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Phase 1

Some of you may recall reading my Happy New Year post from the beginning of the year where I talked about some of the changes I wanted to make in myself. I just wanted to let you know that I am actively working on accomplishing this goal. The biggest change I want to make is, of course, with my weight. However, there are so many factors surrounding the entire weight issue. There’s so much pressure, judgment and bad feelings involved it’s a hard subject to tackle. I don’t want to announce that I’m on a diet and then be spotted eating a cookie, because that’s going to give people a reason to judge me. If you see my fat ass with a cookie you are going to assume that I will never succeed at my diet, or that I have already fallen off the wagon. Even though I know I have eaten nothing but blueberries, cottage cheese and lean ham for the past 3 weeks you only know that people on diets don’t eat cookies. And that’s why diets fail.

Seriously, in this type of situation there are only 3 options:
1.) never eat a cookie again – YEAH RIGHT!
2.) sneak your food and hide while you eat the cookie (which leads to binging)
3.) don’t tell anyone you are on a diet – which means no one is encouraging you and supporting you – also means you have no accountability and can quit anytime you want.

I have done a lot of diets. Some of them have worked really well, but none of them have ever been permanent. Besides, the word “diet” actually makes me hungry. This is why I am not currently dieting and hope to never go on another diet again.

What I am doing sounds much more dramatic. I’m “changing my lifestyle”. Taking baby steps towards my goal of being a better me. It’s slow going, trust me. Since the beginning of the year I have only lost 5 pounds. Fairly small number for someone as big as me. Heck, about 3 years ago I was on a diet that resulted in me losing 11 pounds in my first week. But obviously, that didn’t stick so what’s the point.

Only 5 pounds in approx. 16 days isn’t a very big loss. But what is big is some of the changes I have made in my lifestyle. For example, I am no longer putting any food in my mouth after 9:00 pm. That may sound kinda late to most of you. The common rule is not to eat anything in the 2 hours before your bedtime. But since I stay up until an average time of 1:30 am – 2:00 am, not eating after 9:00 is meaningful. And difficult. I mean not even a bite of food goes in my mouth, whether it’s good healthy food or not. That one was especially rough on me last night cause I was feeling restless and there were a few squares of peanut butter fudge in the kitchen. It’s hard not to walk by and pop one in your mouth, but I did it.

Another change has been taking out smaller portions of food and drinking more liquids with my meals. Liquids is a tough one for me cause I’m very rarely thirsty. I seriously can go days with nothing more than 1 glass of tea or perhaps 1 can of diet coke. Nurses complain anytime I need blood drawn because my veins withered away and died of dehydration at about the age of 12. So, filling my stomach with liquids is going to actually do a lot of good. I’m not drinking as much as I should yet, but I’m working on it.

Something else completely new is that I am going to be adding a new daily feature to this blog called “1, 2, 3”. It will be a post that will be nothing more than 3 positive statements about myself that day. The reason behind this one is that I am my own worst enemy. Nobody hates me as much as I do and nobody talks as bad about me as I do. I call myself fat, dorky, stupid and gross countless times a day – whether I’m talking internally to myself or actually conversing with other people. Obviously that has to change. So I’m going to force myself to think of positive things and try to quit talking negatively about myself.

Those are the baby steps I have taken in Phase 1. As soon as I have these things under control and they become second nature, I will introduce Phase 2. No quitting this time!

Monday, January 14, 2008

Random Thoughts For The Day

Wow, Conan O'Brien is actually funnier without his writers.

Olive Garden's new Lasagna Rollatini with Chicken looks really good.

Have I ever eaten at Olive Garden before? Oh yeah, I went once in 1996. I should probably go back.

I hope it snows enough to be pretty tomorrow.

If only my treadmill were here already, I could be walking right now instead of doing all this silly thinking.

Well, this list is long enough. Time to play some Warcraft games.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Aw, How Cute!

A baby stop sign and his mommy!

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Blast From The Past

Inspired by the cold weather outside.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

A Letter Of Apology...To My Roommate

Dear Roommate,
Thank you for allowing me to share your house with you. It's a beautiful house and is not even a year old yet. So fresh. So new looking. With white walls and cream carpet. Unscarred countertops, glistening appliances. I really appreciate how lucky I am to be living there. Everything is so shiny.

But, I'm afraid that will all soon change. I regret to inform you that I will no longer be doing the necessary housework that is required to keep a brand new house looking I realize I never have actually done as much housework as I should have, but I have managed to keep up the appearance of clean. Sadly, that is no longer going to be true.

I'm sorry, dear roommate but your house will no longer get the attention it needs from me. You have no one to blame but yourself - for it was you who introduced me to World of Warcraft. I will no longer be leaving my computer aside from bathroom breaks and occasionally going to work.

Monday, January 07, 2008

Where Have All The Pretty People Gone?

Back in the late 80's & early 90's I was a fan of a little show called American Gladiators. Maybe that makes me a nerd, maybe not. Either way, I even had a favorite gladiator - Zap! She rocked. I always rooted for the contestants until there was an event Zap was involved in, then I wanted her to smash everyone into the ground. She usually did. ESPN Classic has been showing reruns of this series for quite a while now, and watching it just isn't quite the same. You can tell they are old shows and they just don't hold my interest.

So, I was excited to hear that American Gladiators was making a return. And being hosted by the always popular Terry Bollea (Hulk Hogan) and the recently popular Laila Ali (gorgeous & charming daughter of Muhammad Ali) was an added bonus. But just a few minutes into the 2 hour premiere last night, I was already disappointed. These new gladiators...well, some of them are pretty weird. I just didn't care for most of them. The original gladiators looked pretty cheesy, but only because that's the way you were supposed to look in 1990. Let me show you what I mean:

Here's the original group:

Here's a new guy named Wolf - who howls like a wolf rather than speaking

This guys name is Toa - before his event he spouted off a few sentences in some sort of Egyptian sounding language:

Here's one of the girls, Stealth - didn't really do anything weird, she's just not attractive:

Finally, we meet Hellga - the picture speaks for itself:

Now for a group photo:

They aren't even wearing the red, white & blue uniforms that I got so used to seeing. I'm not saying I won't watch it - the competition is still goood. But, I am very disappointed.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Taking The Plunge

After many, many, many, many, many requests from my brother to check out World of Warcraft, I'm finally going to do it. Tonight. Right now. Taking the plunge. I've always been interested in checking the game out, but remained hesitant to actually create an account because, well, because I seem to have a short attention span. Not in an ADD type of way, it's just that I have always been a "jack of all trades, master of none". I always become extremely interested in a subject and will devote a week or two of complete focus on it and then one random day my mind will suddenly say "Hey, I love cross stitch" and BOOM - just like that my previous addiction will be gone and I will spend the next 2 weeks cross stitching my little heart out.
Sprinkle and repeat.

But I seem to be in between obsessions at the moment, and Scott provided me with a 14 day free trial of the game. So, since that should be just about the right length of time for me to completely obsess about it and then completely get over it, I decided I might as well just do it. Here goes nothing.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Something Must Be Wrong With Me

Earlier today I was joking around with one of my friends that something must be wrong with me because while I was perusing the internet I stumbled across a page that had some crafty type stuff on it and I was immediately hit with the strong desire to buy a sewing machine and make myself some pillows. We laughed heartily for several minutes about that one, cause we both know I'm not a very girly girl. However, a few short hours later and I'm sitting here thinking about how I can rearrange the spare bedroom and setup a table where I can make notecards and paint things. HELP!

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Happy New Year

Well, it's 2008. Another. Year. Wasted. Seriously need to step up my game and actually put this new year to good use. I've been nagging myself lately to stop being an asshole, maybe it's time to actually do it. Of course, I'm not an asshole in the common sense of the word, but I feel like I'm an asshole and my opinion of me should count for something.

Why do I feel this way about myself? Because I'm the one who hears all the grumbling behind the scenes. You know, like when I decide that I'm going to do something nice and then afterwards find myself grumbling internally about how much stupid work it was. Ri-dic-ulous! I decided to do it, if I hadn't done it no one would have ever even known. So, am I mad at myself? That's stupid.

Here's another example: I enjoy my job, I specifically chose to work where I do, I get paid really well and work for an extremely awesome boss - yet I find myself having conversations with my coworkers about how much this place sucks. Bullshit! This place is awesome. Do I have stressful days? Sure. Does the company make decisions that affect me without asking my opinion? Absolutely. Do I sometimes get off the phone and want to pull my hair out? Yes. Would I rather work somewhere, anywhere, else? HELL NO! Then there's no point in me complaining is there? Instead of falling in line with the negativity that surrounds me at work, I should start trying to infect them with a positive attitude. Then maybe we could all have fun at work like we used to.

Also, I suck! I'm so worried about everyone else that I ignore my wants and needs. And I'm completely indecisive as a result. Let's say I am shopping with a friend and it's time for lunch. "Where do you think we should eat?" she asks. Simple enough question, right? Wrong! Instead of saying "I would like to eat at ______" (depends on what I'm craving that day & how long it's been since I've gone out to eat), I say "I don't care, wherever you want to" and end up sucking down soggy shrimp at Captain D's. Keep in mind, this is just an example. Doesn't seem to be a very good one, either - but it's all I could come up with. My point is, I refuse to make a decision if I believe someone else may not care for it. Which forces that person to make the decision and a lot of times, I don't care for it. So, that has to stop. It's not like a hang out with complete buttheads (anymore). If I would be assertive and make a choice every once in a while, they would go along with it the same way I go along with their choices. And I'm not just talking about deciding where to eat lunch. I try to choose what I think other people want in everything I do. I worry if they like what my hair looks like. I worry if they like the kind of music that I'm listening to. I worry if they think I'm talking too much, or if they think I'm not talking enough. I worry that they won't like me once we're actually hanging out. Or I worry that friends I've had for years will suddenly realize they don't like me.

I'm paranoid. I'm fat and I'm paranoid because of it. One day, several years ago, I was walking alongside a path with a couple of friends when a car drove by and some young guy leaned out the window and hollered something. I was immediately humiliated because I clearly heard him say "it's not working, fatso". I was very upset and my friends could see something was wrong with me. Carol asked me what was the matter. "Didn't you just hear that guy who drove by?", I asked her. "Yeah," she said, "that was one of my son's friends who hollered at me to get back to work. He drives by here every day on his way home." I'm still convinced he was making fun of me. That's what I expect from people. Even while pumping gas I wonder how many people are driving by and laughing at my fat ass. The worst thing by far is buying food, ordering food, eating food. Anything to do with food. I can just imagine all the people walking by saying "look at that fat ass with all that food." In reality, I know that I'm not important enough for everyone to spend their time thinking about me. I'm certainly not the center of attention for anyone, much less everyone. But my mind sure does trick itself into thinking everyone is grossed out by me. Trust me when I say that's not a fun way to go through life. Makes me feel like an asshole that I'm torturing myself this way.

I never expect people to like me. Which means I rarely give them a chance to get to know me. Why waste their time and mine? As a result, I don't really meet many people. Hmm...weird how that works, isn't it? It doesn't normally bother me too bad because I spend a lot of time with my siblings and cousins and we truly enjoy each other and have a total blast. But I'm starting to get old and I obviously can't fall in love, get married and have babies if I spend every weekend playing Trivial Pursuit at grandma's house. So, I've got to get out there and meet people. Somehow. If only I could figure out how to like myself long enough to let someone else like me too. That would be quite a trick, wouldn't it? Man, I'm such an asshole.

You may wonder why I'm bringing all of this up. I'm not exactly sure. I just know I want to make myself a better person and I'm kind of hoping that publicly admitting some of my faults will embarass me into changing them. I started the day determined that I was going to make a post which actually stated my weight, because I am now working on fixing that issue also. But, I just can't bring myself to post that yet. I want to so that it's out there in black & white, staring me in the face, making me accountable. But, I'm just too embarassed about the number. It sucks, because if I don't post it and then tell you in 2 weeks that I've lost 10 pounds, it won't have as big an impact as it would if you knew my starting weight. Any advice?