Today's "5 Things I Dislike About...."

Five things I dislike about...Elvis

5. He died.
4. He never bought ME a Cadillac.
3. He is best remembered as the sequined-jumpsuit-wearing Elvis of his latter years, thus resulting in all Elvis imposters dressing that way instead of imitating the HOT Elvis of his early years.
2. He shook his hips so provocatively it was censored, so we have no clear pictures of his behind.
1. He’s the reason why I can’t eat peanut butter and banana sandwiches without being made fun of.